Often times people find themselves single for months or years at a time. You get so consumed by being alone and having your own routine. Sometimes it’s not even about having your own routine but simply being never ready for a relationship fully. There are a few ways in which you can be ready for a relationship and these ways will also help you notice when you are ready for a relationship.
Am I ready for a relationship?
There are a few things that may help you recognise whether or not you are ready for a relationship. It’s all very subtle and focused on 90% of your mental state. This is not to say you only mentally healthy people can date but there are quite a few things that play a role in how the relationship goes. Here is how to tell if you are ready for a relationship:
Emotional independence is very important when being in a relationship. Being able to not have your mood waver based on another person’s actions is very important. Remembering and reminding yourself that you’re an individual and so are they will free you from a lot of expectations and possible heartache.
Being Happy Single
This is the biggest indicator that you will be happy in a relationship as well. When you know yourself and what you have to offer, it’s easier to determine who is and who isn’t for you. The level of self-love and self-care you have for yourself will be your biggest protector in and outside of a relationship. Realizing that someone else cannot make you happy and that you hold all the happiness in you, is the key to fulfilling relationships.
You have spent time alone
Often times people can be “single” and stool be dating multiple people at once. Although there is no flaw in this you haven’t spent time alone. Be okay with being by yourself in every form. This also takes away any neediness, clinginess or need for validation you may have. It is a freeing feeling. At first, it will be hard, but once you focus solely on yourself, giving yourself the love, time and validation you may want from others, beautiful healthy relationships blossom.
You know yourself
As people, we are constantly evolving of course but it’s important to know yourself. You know what you would do, what you like, what you don’t like and so much more. This way no one can possibly get you out of character or convince you that you are someone else. Your chances of being manipulated may be low.
What to do if I’m not ready for a relationship?
The best thing to do if you’re not ready for a relationship is nothing. As controversial as it may sound, you cannot force yourself to be ready for something you aren’t. It’s like going bungee jumping, some people decide to walk back down and others face their fears. You might decide to be ready once you’re in the relationship already although this is uncommon it sometimes works. A few other proactive things you could do before you get into a relationship are:
Doing what you want
The best way to get over something is to see it through. A part of you wants to dig deeper and enjoy your time, continue to do that until you’re ready
Commitment is not for everyone
This is something important to remember. If you have not felt the desire to be in a relationship, don’t force it out of yourself.