It is very important to have your own life outside of your relationship. Having a separate life because not necessarily mean that your partner is only important when you’re together. Instead, this creates a healthy level of attachment between two well none of you depends on seeing each other every day every hour. Having a separate life from your relationship is normally a sign of a serious relationship or at least one that is heading there. It is not negative nor is it a sign of not having a loving relationship.
How to have a separate life from your relationship
The first step is to definitely be creating one before your single life. You can’t get into a relationship and then two months and begin building your own life. Not to say that it’s not possible but it’s a bit more convenient if you already had it before. Here are some ways to help you have your own separate life:
Have friends specific to your favourite hobbies
When you have friends that you do certain things with every week it’s sort of gives you a set schedule. weather is gaming on your PS5 every 9:00 on a Wednesday or playing golf on a Saturday morning. This gives you something to look forward to that does not involve your relationship. This is not to say that your partner may not join you forever but it’s your own favourite thing to do that does not include your partner. This also gives you time to do your favourite things and hang out with your favourite people.
Have a hobby that you do every week
Some people enjoy cleaning by themselves or just taking themselves out shopping. Whatever your hobby maybe if it’s something you did by yourself in your single life continue to do it. Yes, it would be super fun to bring your partner along and do those things with you but “me time” is important. Your partner would be very understanding of this if they had certain hobbies that they just do by themselves which makes it romantic to some extent. To allow yourself and your partner to together yet do things separately.
Have a daily routine
This is to save you from boredom and unproductivity. When you are bored you tend to overly depend on the entertainment and the attention of your partner. You want to make sure that you have your own thing going on whether they text you or they don’t weather there with you or they are not. This does not shout out your partner but simply shows a healthy level of attachment that you still want to hear from them talk to them but even if they’re busy with their own life you don’t feel threatened by that.
Spend time with family
Spending time with family is very important even when you’re in a relationship. Your family helps you feel like yourself. Sometimes in relationships, we get so caught up in making the other person happy and in our butterfly feelings that we sort of lose our truest form. Although it’s not a bad loss it is something you still need to type in here and then and the best way to do that is by being with your family when you can.
Is having a separate life healthy for your relationship?
Yes. One of the biggest things to keep your relationship healthy, is space. There is a very thin line between a healthy attachment and a very unhealthy attachment. Oftentimes the lines can be blurred and when you’re in a relationship you sometimes ignore those lines until it’s too late.
You and your partner are being able to have your own drive to time and space for you two to miss each other. Missing each other gives you the chance to do romantic things for each other as well as have more fun moments when we see each other. When you don’t give each other space or any other things to do in life and all you have is each other you also lose who you are in the process.